Setting Goals Leads to Your Vision
Turn Life’s Challenges into Success.
Before you start working towards your goals, you need a clear vision. This vision gives you direction and helps you stay motivated. It also helps you create rules for living a healthy life both outside in society and inside yourself.
Figuring Out Your Vision For Life
To find your vision, ask yourself,
#1 "Who were you?"
Reflecting on your past is essential for personal growth. It requires you to be brutally honest about your experiences, mistakes, and the lessons learned. This process can be uncomfortable, but it's incredibly valuable. Take a moment to explore your journey, perhaps using an exercise like the Sorry Exercise to confront who you were and how far you've come. Revisiting your past allows you to see patterns, recognize your strengths, and use that understanding as motivation toward your future vision.
#2 "Who are you?"
This question requires present-day self-awareness. It’s about acknowledging who you are in this moment, your current mindset, values, and behavior. Ask yourself, "What do I stand for today? What are my strengths, weaknesses, and core beliefs?" Be honest with your answer—this clarity will help you understand where you are on your journey and identify areas that need growth.
#3 "Who do you want to become?"
This is your opportunity to envision your future self. Think about the goals, qualities, and characteristics you want to embody. What kind of person do you want to be in five years? Ten years? This vision will serve as your north star, guiding your daily decisions and actions toward becoming the person you aspire to be. Embrace this vision with passion and purpose—it will fuel your transformation.
Really reflect and think about these questions.
Memorable Life Experiences: Remember the important events in your life. Did they help you grow or challenge you?
What if I told you this was a trick question? These experiences shape who you are. Was it important to you, or important for other people? To be honest, I never thought I would graduate from college, let alone attend graduate school. I couldn’t see that far. I think memorable life experiences only become memorable after going through the best and worst moments. That's how they become memorable. It becomes part of you.
The world we live in is EVER-CHANGING
Best and Worst Moments: Think about the best and worst things that have happened to you. They show what matters most to you. Some of my best moments came after some of my worst moments in life. I read a book called, “Chillapenuer” recommended by a mentor of mine, and it taught me about not giving up during your worst moments. Lets get deep, without getting too deep- I had a nervous breakdown two years ago, I was go-go-go for 5 years straight without a day of rest. My business was all I could ever think about telling myself, “There's always something to do everyday” and it caught up to me trying to build a business from the ground up. I thought that was it, I thought I was part of that club where you say, “Don’t start a business, look what happened to me”. Don’t ever doubt yourself, you just have to stick it out just a little bit longer and not to just give up when you reach your lowest points. This book taught me that my lowest points are just indicators that your Highest Points are right around the corner! And sure enough they were, It's like if you stopped watering a plant right before its about to sprout. You’ve been watering it for weeks and then suddenly stop!?. Trust me when I say, DON’T GIVE UP! DON’T STOP! You’re so much closer to that goal, finish line, or the tailend of this hardship stay in the fight!
Facing Our Fears: Everyone has fears and worries. What are yours? Knowing them definitely helps you to overcome them. Going back to college as the “old guy” sucked! Lol haha. And I failed my 1st semester of college with a 0.8GPA. I had two choices, quit college and get a job, or go back the next semester and kill it! I learned that fears are just paper-tigers, we let our fears become real tigers until we challenge ourselves and shed our old belief system of “what was”. I’ve mentally used that 1st semester of college as fuel for so many other fears I had in the past, life is a game and the game is viewed through the lens of our mindsets and perspectives.
Regrets and Reflections: What do you wish you had done differently? Learning from regrets can guide your future choices. I have this quote that I live by and share it with all my friends, clients, and anyone who wants to listen to me talk lol.
“Your past doesn’t define you, but everything up till-now is your fault. The good, the bad, and everything in between.”
Here’s a secret I’ve learned over the years. We can’t see the past nor see the future, we can only see the now, this present moment is all we have to live for. We create the future in the present. Unfortunately we only live in the physical world, I can physically see you and you can physically see me. We can’t see each other in the past or future, even if we really think about it. It's just impossible. So my theory is this: live everyday, live every moment for you, the people you love, and the people you want to create future positive memories with. Live through your values, morals, ethics, principles, and belief system. Have faith in your fate. We all have had regrets in the past, but that's the past, and we get caught up making present choices due to our past regrets. This is your wake up call! Shift your mindset from the past to the present-future. I think we’ve mentally lived there long enough. You got this!
Testing Limits: Recall times when you were pushed to your limits. These moments reveal your strength.
Accomplishments and Failures: What are your biggest successes and failures? Both teach important lessons. Welp, I guess I’ll share a story of when I was on the brink of signing a Brazilian Professional Soccer contract in Santos, Brazil.
At that moment in my life, being invited to Pele’s Futbol Academy and being presented with a soccer contract was the biggest accomplishment and biggest failure on my part at that time. I was 19 years old, soccer was life, I never thought my peers were world class players all striving to become the best. I loved the game. I loved the culture and psychology behind playing soccer.
My biggest failure was not recognizing where I was in life, not recognizing the greatest opportunity in my life was in the palm of my hand.
Before I continue, take a moment to detach yourself from your own personal lives for a second. Soak it all in. You're alive! Take a deep breath and inhale from your nose and slowly exhale through your mouth. Life is good. Try my gratitude exercise. Remember, gratitude runs parallel with results.
Ok, so on my second to last day there, my coaches presented me with a 1 inch think soccer contract. They gave me a quick speech about how they’ve never seen an american as talented as i was playing soccer. The contract was for 2 years, and with the idea of a European club team purchasing me afterwards. Brazil is a factory for generating some of the best soccer players in the world. I was at the right place at the right time. So why did I decline it?
I declined it due to personal reasons, I missed home, but at that time I didn’t realize I was self sabotaging myself. Thinking to myself, this is too good to be true. I would have been one of the first Americans to ever sign a Brazilian soccer contract at that time. What an honor that could have been.
Check this out, A Sports Illustrated article reports that 78% of NFL players and 60% of NBA players face serious financial hardships after retirement. So why do so many athletes wind up bankrupt?
This is my opinion, I think once you go back to your hometown, back to your friends and family it's difficult being accepted. You left and leveled up your life for so long that coming back to your childhood homes subconsciously forces you to fit back in and to be accepted and the only way that's possible is to level down again. Carry the same hardships as they do. Unfortunately.
Snoop Dogg, has a quote, “I kept dropping my standards to help bring my boys up, I was climbing 1 step up and stepping down 2 steps every time, so I had to make a decision in my career. Do I keep bringing them back up with me even though they don’t take accountability for their actions? Or do I leave them and continue chasing my dreams?” Remember its not your responsibility to bring joy and happiness to others while you’re searching for your own self love and happiness. Sacrifice that time and invest it in yourself, it's not forever- it's only temporary.
I kinda felt like that, if I were to have taken that soccer contract, instead of focusing on my future, I was more invested in how others would accept me or not accept me. So I self sabotage myself. Wanting to fit in rather than to be the example, the leader, the game changer. I hadn’t developed that mindset yet, which is another reason for starting Mogressive Coaching. Life is short, we can’t focus on others when we have so much to learn about ourselves.
I don’t live with any regrets, but I’ve learned from all of my failures and translated them into life lessons to grow, and to learn more about myself.
This Blog was taken directly from my latest eBook, “Teaspoons of Change” You can download it for free here.
